Category Archives: Dating

A Sexy Dream, Of Being Pulled

Posted on 16/07/2022 by ValeryNorth

It’s actually rare for me to dream while asleep, of anything sexual happening. So last night’s screening at the cinema of my subconscious mind was a pleasant surprise in many ways. It started off fairly chastely, with dreaming about trans … Continue reading →

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Life at 40: Middle-aged and Not Dead Yet

Posted on 09/07/2018 by ValeryNorth

CONTENT NOTE: Suicidal ideation; mention of BDSM So last weekend was a big family party to celebrate my 40th birthday. My birthday was not actually this weekend, but close enough to make tacking on a party to a previously scheduled … Continue reading →

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No-Strings learning experience

Posted on 06/03/2017 by ValeryNorth

Yesterday was the first time I have had no-strings-attached BDSM sex that was agreed from the outset would be nothing else: no romantic element, no “ownership”, no “relationship”. We get along as friends, but as far as the sex goes … Continue reading →

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Your Flirty Joke Is My Reality

Posted on 10/06/2015 by ValeryNorth

I forget whom I saw write about how some of the ways that nonBDSM people are free to talk about sexuality while hinting at kink, or at least “vanilla with sprinkles”, but it was probably Clarisse Thorn (though it may … Continue reading →

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The neediness of New Labour: what Labour can learn from dating gurus

Posted on 12/05/2015 by ValeryNorth

In the debate about the future of the Labour Party, there are already people demanding a return to the policies of New Labour, which I have already discussed as a mistaken idea confusing correlation with causation. Now, I’d like to … Continue reading →

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Early indications from “36 Questions” online dating experiment

Posted on 13/02/2015 by ValeryNorth

For the past couple of weeks, I have been following a simple formula for my first contact messages on Plenty of Fish, which is a freebie (i.e. ad-funded) dating website. I used the “36 questions to fall in love” concept … Continue reading →

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The curse of seeing the other side

Posted on 07/02/2015 by ValeryNorth

Content Note: brief discussion of abusive situations and “victim” mentality. I am a wee bit short on what to write. (You get that yesterday’s post should have have been done on Monday, right? so this is the post that is … Continue reading →

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Deriving web dating from 36 Questions

Posted on 25/01/2015 by ValeryNorth

In my post about the “36 Questions to Fall in Love” article last week, I wrote that, “I want to come back to this, and see if I can construct a way of using the concepts in dating. For instance, … Continue reading →

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Lab-grown intimacy: does one size fit all?

Posted on 15/01/2015 by ValeryNorth

The other day, I found an article from the New York Times about Arthur Aron’s experiments in intimacy, and how the writer (Mandy Len Catron) had tried it for herself. The idea is that, given the right conditions, it is … Continue reading →

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Vive la revolution d’Elust 65!

Posted on 16/12/2014 by ValeryNorth

Photo courtesy of SassyCat Welcome to Elust #65 – The only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month. Whether you’re looking for sex journalism, erotic writing, relationship advice or kinky discussions it’ll … Continue reading →

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